My favorite movie's title translates approximately to "Sex, shame and tears."

I suppose it could all boil down to that. Yesterday I had a bombshell dropped on me and I am still trying to figure things out because of it. Where we go, what we do, and how we do it is all in question. Of course, to some extent I'm powerless because I'm just so far removed from it all that I can't do anything but watch and pray. I'll do whatever I can to help though, because blood is thicker than water.

After all of last evening's unexpected news, I experienced some time well spent reading The Book Of Questions. It's just full of random questions that place you in a predicament that hopefully you'll never encounter, but are definitely interesting to have to answer.

I have a habit of creating all my own problems. I told my dad I need to remember how good I have things. I worry about getting my laundry done on time while others are swimming in despair. I am thankful for all the things that I have and the things that happen in my life because for the most part, they bring excitement and entertainment. This morning was no exception. No hope, no wishes, just honest appreciation.

I sort of wish I hadn't used the words I did yesterday. I don't want to burden anyone. But just remember that I don't have any hope, and that is the bright side of it all. Hopelessness equates to appreciation. Sincere appreciation at that, because without someone to talk and chill with like yesterday, I would have been up all night stressing about all the shit that's going on. I owe you for that one. And remember that because you have been honest with me, I'll always be honest with you. I'm not busy waiting for something more to develop; instead I'm just enjoying the now.